Monday, July 24, 2017

Sign of the Times

Today’s category: Miscellaneous
Sign of the Times
      – Plumber "We repair what your husband Fixed."
      – On the trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania "Don’t sleep with a drip, call your plumber."
      – Pizza shop slogan "7 days without pizza makes one Weak."
      – At a tire shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout."
      – Door of a plastic surgeons office: "Hello, can we pick your nose?"
      – Sign at the psychic’s Hotline "Don’t call us, we’ll call you."
      – At A Laundry Shop "How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no charge, close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be satisfactory?"
      – At a Towing Company: "We don’t charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
      – Billboard on the side of the road "Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs."
      – On an Electricians truck "Let us remove your shorts."
      – In a Nonsmoking Area " If we see smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
      – On Maternity Room Door "Push, Push, Push."
      – At an Optometrists Office "If you don’t see what your looking for you’ve come to the right place."
      – On a Taxidermist’s window "We really know our stuff."
      – In a Podiatrist’s office "Time wounds all heels."
      – On a Butchers window "Let me meat your needs."
      – On a fence "Salesman Welcome, Dog food is expensive."
      – At a car Dealership "The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment."
      – Outside a Muffler Shop "No appointment Necessary, we hear you coming."
      – Outside a Hotel "Help! We need inn-experienced people."
      – On a desk in a reception room "We shoot every 3rd salesman , and the 2nd one just left."
      – In a Veterinarians waiting room "Be back in 5 minutes, Sit ! Stay! "
      – At the Electric Company "We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don’t you will be."
      – On the door of a Computer Store "Out for a quick byte."
      – In a Restaurant window "Don’t stand there and be hungry, come on in and get fed up."
      – Inside a Bowling Alley "Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop."
      – In the front yard of a funeral home "Drive carefully, we’ll wait."
      – In a counselors office "Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional.

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Date: July 24, 2017 at 09:08PM
From: “ChristiansUnite Christian Joke of the Day”
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Reposted by: To Live Like Jesus Clothing Company
Category: Joke of the Day


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